Some people are extraordinarily talented. You know, the people for whom everything they touch turns to gold? Everything they put their mind to tends to just work out?
I am not such a person. I do not have many natural gifts. I’ve thought about it, and I may only have one. Being “real”. Calling it how I see it. I’m not saying I’m amazingly insightful, or that I am always right… It just feels like maybe the thing I am meant to do with my life is be blunt. Be honest. Speak truth.
It’s not that I’ve never lied. I have. But it seems to me the moments when I’ve gotten myself or other people is when I stopped being who I was supposed to be – direct & honest.
Seriously. Sometimes I think it’s pretty much the only thing I’ve got going for me.
I’m not that great of a Pastor – to be honest, people tend to scare me. Not for any valid reason, I just get panicky if I have to be social, or if I have to phone someone I don’t really know… Etc etc.
I’m not that good of a speaker either. I don’t do anything flashy, I don’t use alliteration or have three concise points. Or any of the tricks you are supposed to have in your speaking repertoire.
There are many people who are way more talented than I am.
All I can do is be who I was designed to be. To speak what I’m thinking. To communicate, to be honest… To do what I can.
It’s tough sometimes to be who you are supposed to be. There are frequently millions of voices that pop out of the woodwork and tell you to stop – from your own fears and your questioning yourself, to those that are around you, sometimes offering sincere advice… Sometimes simply not understanding.
I don’t know what my life will look like at the end. All I know is to pursue what God puts in front of me. To use the gifts he has given me, and use them to pursue what He wants for me, those around me, and the world.
It may seem silly for me to suggest that simply by speaking truth I could affect the world… But I believe that God does have a plan, a desire for this world, and if each one of us could figure out where we stand and live up to our responsibility, the world could become a drastically different place.
So, to start… I am going to do my best to not be ruled by fear or anything else – I will look to the steps that God lays out in front of me, and take them.
He is my director, He and none other. I need to tie that truth so close to my heart that in the most confusing times, it shines as a beacon for each step.
God, and God alone will rule my life. I will do my best to follow him in everything. As a result, hopefully becoming a true ambassador for God.
One full of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, self-control… And with the aura of one who walks with God (like Enoch, Noah, Abraham and all the rest).
I don’t have much to offer. Only what I’ve got. But if I remain paralyzed because I don’t think it’s enough, evil wins.
God knows what His plan is even when I don’t.
I’m going to trust him with all my heart – ignore my own logic, chase after him in everything I do… And rest assured that as long as I’m listening, he’ll be making my path straight. As in Proverbs 3.5-6