I believe that the only way to truly learn lessons is to live them.
I also believe that unless you are able to apply the things that you think God is trying to teach you (and others) you are just blowing smoke when you talk about them all the time.
I don’t want this blog to become a place where I ramble on about ideas I have, and let the thoughts take over my life, the writing down of the thoughts take over my life, and not spend the time ACTING OUT what I believe I am being taught.
As a result of that desire, I am going to try and have at least one post a week that isn’t just talking about the ideas that I have for walking with God/churches, but sharing my journey as I try to apply them to my life.
So – right now I’m going to share my personal journey of trying to improve in my listening to & obeying the voice of God (no matter how good a person is at this – I am sure there is always room for growth). That listening is the basis, if you have been reading, of the Light & Easy series – that I believe if we can learn to plug into what God has for us, what He wants us to do, (and only what He wants us to do) much of the weight of our lives can be dissolved.
I think I’ve been doing okay so far – just okay though, not great. I still struggle with the follow-through on some things.
My biggest issue? Fear. Not in everything, but, really, I think fear has always been my biggest weakness and has been what has caused 95% of the times that I have not followed through with something I thought maybe God wanted me to do.
The stupidest thing that’s ever held me back? My fear of phoning people.
Yes, I know it sounds ridiculous, but I have this thing where I HATE phoning people I don’t know very well. I actually get kind of panicky and LITERALLY have to psyche myself up before the phone call in order to be able to do it. Yesterday I caved and didn’t phone someone that I think I should have because I was too nervous about it… how silly is that? Looking at in perspective it seems ridiculous. It is an irrational fear based on nothing, and I let it prevent me from phoning someone up and trying to encourage them. There should be a big L on my forehead for that.
So, that’s where I’m at in my journey at the moment. Other than that, I feel like I’m doing pretty well – I’ve had some good quiet times with God, I’m being really encouraged in my quest by the book I’ve mentioned before, The Power of a Whisper by Bill Hybels, and there have been a few times when I thought that God was prompting me to do something and I did it. I’ve felt great in those moments.
I try not to beat myself up too badly for the times that I failed and just use them as more motivation to be better in the future.
I am determined that each day that goes by my success rate will get higher and higher – with the big things and the little things. I think it’s the little things that get me – the things I can convince myself don’t REALLY matter if I do them. Like the phone calls. I tell myself I can do them later, or I don’t really need to talk to that person… when maybe I’m just supposed to be letting them know that someone cares.
But like I said, I’m determined to keep getting better at this.
I’m going to close with something I just read in Bill Hybels book that I found incredibly encouraging & inspiring:
“If you ever find yourself with a difficult assignment, why not try giving God thanks for trusting you with something that needs your particular strength. He assigns tasks to the right person every time. He did it throughout history and he still does it today.” (The Power of a Whisper, p111)
How can I NOT go through with an “assignment” – no matter how large or small – when I remember that God is of the opinion that I am the exact perfect person to do the job?